That

“That which is loved is always beautiful”

Getting Cozy

While it is most definitely 100+ degrees outside in this blasphemous desert summer,  you’ll find yourself in a perpetual state of freezing pretty much everywhere you live, work, shop and eat. To combat this Arizona hell heat, everybody and their dog likes to blast the air conditioning to frosty temperatures of 75 degrees and the likes.

OK – perhaps I am a little dramatic… perhaps I’m the girl who has trained herself to always bring a sweater to the movie theaters, and perhaps I intentionally emphasize my miserably chilled state by wrapping my arms around myself and making slight frowns at people who seem content, asking “why aren’t you freezing?!”

It could just be my eternal choice to wear shorts and summer dresses – this IS Arizona – not Seattle. It doesn’t rain. It doesn’t snow. It doesn’t anything. Still, the constant blasts of controlled, chilled air has me dreaming of cozy sweaters and vibrant pants.

baggy knits and skinny colored denim. les do this

Love ’em.

Fleur de Old Lady

I fancy myself to be quite an old lady at heart. I love soft robes. I like getting up early (by choice – not for work – lets be clear on that). I like gossiping like some little old hen. I like my yellow shower cap that, according to the boyfriend, “looks like a baby bonnet.” And I love…

GARDENS.

For serious guys, I love gardens. I could walk around gardens for hours and be completely content. I mean – add some food (preferably chocolate or cheese… oh and wine) and I’ve got my own little paradise.

I heard gardens take a lot of patience to maintain which blows because I’m kind of a – I’ll be really patient and consistent for a week then forget  to water the plant – kind of girl.  So I simply seek out gardens wherever I travel and make my loved ones suffer in boredom while I frolic through flowers and basically just love my life.

With the exception of 80’s prom carnations and cliched red roses (woof) – all flowers are my favorite.

credit: http://4.bp.blogspot.com

In particular, I do love peonies. They are just so friggin JUICY. So big and vibrant and lovely to look at – close up and from afar. They’re absolutely stunning in every stage of their bloom.

Flowers. That’s where it’s at!

20-Something

Lets talk about….

Sex baybayy lets talk about you and mehhh.

Just kidding – back to 2013. Lets talk about something else -real talk: being a 20-something.

I think back to my 18-year old self, back to my sweet visions of being 20-something, fresh out of college. Ha. Ha. HA. I chuckle. The idyllic and hilariously glamorous things I thought I would be doing…. I mean, I was totally going to get some fabulous marketing job – you know, “suffer” a little with some funny little internship at a bad ass advertising firm and just pop, magically start making money. I’d also not meet anyone serious until I was 28 – not even kidding, I’ve come to realize I had this specific age in my head. Until then, I would be too young and adventurous to really love anyone.

Well – life. You got me again! Everything is different. Post college I moved in with my parents and haven’t left about one year later. I fell in love and have stayed in love (whoa whoa whoa whoa whoaaaa Miss Independent is freakin the fug out) AND I have a very non-glamorous job. Enjoyable, sometimes challenging, definitely a lesson and great experience, but not glamorous. My plans didn’t come to fruition.

A little over a year later – do you know what I’m thinking?

Screw all those plans.

My new hopes and aspirations feel better.  All at once they seem way too impossible and totally doable because I just love them so much. And all the stuff I fought initially, rebelled and resented –  it became my favorite part of life. I have loved living with my parents. My dad is an EPIC cook, who revels in the chance to make something delicious for “one of his little chickens.” I’ve paid off all my student loans and I’m debt free. My mom has essentially become my best friend. We text. We gossip post-work. We lay out by the pool – matching Blue Moons in hand.

This whole love thing, if you asked my guy, he would happily explain to you that I wasn’t the easiest catch. I loved him pretty quickly but there was a lot of internal conflict and I’d spill my emotional guts so he knew and spent our first months of dating completely unsure whether I would just dip out one day because love was so not “me.” Ha. Ha. Ha. I chuckle again. I love him so much its barftastic. And I think it is “me.” Nowadays, it feels “me” to love him. To blissfully, comfortably, enjoy my own completely selfish habits but to love him all the while.

As for not having a super glamorous job  – well, that is still coming. That hope is not changed. I want that – sort of. Not glamorous. It could be dirty and stressful and madness. I just want to love it.

Everyone always says life comes to you unexpectedly and you can’t imagine what will happen. Actually, life – you’ve been kind of expected until now – these were some big-ass curve balls. I felt completely screwed and out of control of my own life… it is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I’m glad to know it won’t be the last time.